ONAT LOPERA

It was a long and grueling day, but then all became insignificant due to a hamper of dirty clothes.

I found out  yesterday that my gate pass was missing. We looked everywhere. Between my bag and my wallet, and in the state of our house (flood-mode), it is almost like looking for a 1 peso coin in a haystack.

I knew from the start that losing that gate pass would be tedious and demanding because of the requirements needed to apply for a replacement. I searched the internet to verify what I already know and there it was: a notarized affidavit of loss, CTC (Community Tax Certificate), police or NBI clearance.

So I started with the CTC. Went to the City Hall and asked where I could get one. Straight through the glass door and to the left, there it was. I remember it was only about 20 pesos or so when I got one a few years back so I already have a small bill ready on my hand. After filling in the blanks, I was asked what was my year 2008’s salary-worth. From the top of my head, I computed and pulled an estimate. The man behind the counter fiddled with his calculator (or did he really?) and just said out loud “one hundred ninety-seven pesos”. Dozen times higher than what I was expecting, I pulled 200 pesos from my wallet. Seconds later, he handed my CTC in those small plastic shields and my change. Another lady was there requesting and before I left, she was handing a 500 peso bill to the man, he just swayed her hand and said “You don’t have a job, right? That would be 10 pesos only”. The things I pay for my country.

Next was the affidavit of loss. My mom and our office’s HR staff told me that there are a couple of firms in front of the City Hall where I could get an affidavit. I just crossed the street and  I think I walked the whole 2 blocks back and forth and I couldn’t find one. Sporting a puzzled face, a huge bald guy started to approach me and asked what I was looking. I’m not even done with my speech and he just nodded and walked through the steep stairs and there it was, a notary public office. I did thought at first I was going to get mugged. I apologize. So in the office, I was asked by the secretary what I needed. She just rustled through the envelops right away and there it was, already made copies of affidavits waiting to be filled in with my details. I was asked for an ID as reference and there she was whacking away with her old-school typewriter. Everything was done in about 3 minutes. I maybe 200 pesos poorer but it was sure darn convenient. The only iffy thing though was that it was the secretary that signed the affidavit. Hmm. Fishy fishy. I was desperate so I didn’t dare to question it.

A quick sidetrip to the 7-11 and paid our cable bill, I went to the back of City Hall for the police clearance. I found out that if I requested that morning, it’ll be done by Monday afternoon. It was unacceptable, I needed to get all the requirements fast and process the replacement the same morning. Then I remembered the NBI clearance, they release the same day most of the time, so it was worth the shot.

I went home and got my personal copy (needed for renewal). Another tricycle ride and I was greeted with long lines. The whole thing took about 2 hours, from window 1, to window 3, and was cut shot on window 4; verification. It was stamped on my receipt twice: Sept 25. Crap. My clearance would be released in two weeks? Unacceptable. Hopped on to another tricycle back to the City Hall; it’ll be the police clearance. It’s the only choice.

The girl on the window recognized me, I said that I already came from the NBI Clearance office and that I couldn’t wait two weeks. With an “as a matter of fact”-ly tone, she said, “Yes, this would be ready on Monday”. So another round of payments. Puzzled though I paid twice for the Police clearance, one inside and another 100 pesos on the police clearance window. Another form and another picture taken, it was done.

Dog tired, I went to the drugstore before going home. Not even a minute after I arrived, I realized that my affidavit is missing. I couldn’t have left it on the tricycle so I rushed back to the drugstore and it was there on the glass counter. Good thing nobody took it. The girl on the counter smiled and asked if that was mine and if I had left it earlier. I nodded in the midst of relief.

And so the morning ended, accepted that my gate pass is missing and went on with life, sort of speak. Fast forward to 5pm, I was in front of the computer “farming” when my mom yelled and said that she found my ID. Holy crap! She was preparing our dirty clothes for laundry when she found it on the bottom of the hamper. Why the hell it was there!? Only on my wallet and my bag  is where I usually put it. Must have fallen there and got buried. It’s found, that’s the most important thing.

So there it was; sweat, blood, tears and 900 pesos poorer. How badly I needed a strong drink after finding out.